Bronc To Breakfast by Charles M. Russell

 COOK’S SWAG OF DO’S AND DON’TS                     
                               

The young boy viewed his grandad, who was squatting, stirring stew,

reheating last night’s effort for the hungry gutted crew

and as he rode into the camp his grandad gave a yell,

“No horses in this camp my lad!” and meant it, he could tell.

“Bit toey” Gramps,” the lad replied.  “What’s ailing you today?”

Though knew he’d better heed the man or he would pay some way.

“Don’t want the same occurrence lad that got me into strife,

way back when I was young and green, it near cost me my life.”

He knew the old man had a tale, so grabbed a mug of tea

and squatted on his haunches and he listened carefully.

“We’d fifteen hundred head of beef that we were herding south

and I was just a lad like you and had a real smart mouth.

“I thought I knew most everything, as young bucks mostly do,

but came to grief one morning and the cook near skinned me too.

The meanest man I ever knowed.  A sourly looking bloke,

who never laughed at anything and couldn’t take a joke.

“He had a swag of do’s and don’ts and one he made real clear

was  -  keep your horses out of camp -  to which we did adhere.

I guess I wasn’t thinking though the morn that I rode in;

Just doggone tired from night watch, but my troubles then begin.

“I had in mind to have a smoke and sort some kind of light,

So rode toward the fireplace when who should come in sight?

But lad before Cook barked a word, the coals spat out a spark

that landed on my horses rump and left a searing mark.

“All hell broke loose in that there camp and things were looking sad.

The chestnut he just went berserk and cut some capers lad.

He dropped his head and arched his back and kicked with his hind feet.

The mornings breakfast scattered and I nearly lost my seat.

“Some boys were fleeing red hot beans and boiling water too

While others they were cheering, ‘twas all that they could do.

The cook just stood there dumbstruck, his camp was all destroyed

And then he started screaming, “Lad you’ve joined the unemployed.”

“I’ll have your guts for garters boy, I’ll skin you son alive

And if that horse stops bucking you’ll be lucky to survive.

But cookies heart gave out just then, it couldn’t take no more

And that’s the thing that saved me.  I know that lad for sure.

“So if you think I’m toey, well, you know the reason why

And though the cook was ornery he didn’t need to die.

You live and learn in this life son or lose along the way.

I hope you get my savvy boy, that’s all I’ve got to say.”  
                                             

                             ©Australian Bush Poet

                                     Merv Webster

About The Author....MERVE WEBSTER says:

    I was born in the Queensland border town of Goondiwindi and as my dad was a  banker his work took us to a number of towns throughout Queensland. I received my  education to Junior level and then tried my hand at various occupations such as a lad porter  on the railway, then as a clerk for the Commonwealth Bank, an Accountant, and the  Toowoomba City Council. My wife was a Roma girl, Christine Edwards, whom I married  in Toowoomba and we would have four children. (The picture to the left is Merve and Christine.)

    After marrying I worked as a clerk, shop assistant, slaughterman and an  electrical line worker. These jobs took us to towns such as Toowomba, Roma, Cairns,  Gatton, Warialda and Goondiwindi. During my time in Roma I took an interest in stock  work and received an education on all aspects of the life, some of which I'd rather forget,  from a hardened old drover, Chris's dad. In 1994 we moved to Bargara, where I began  writing a book on my family's history. 

    Impressed by the stories told to me, along with the experiences I had with Chris’ dad,  I began trying my hand at writing bush poetry. My first book of bush poetry was called Tales of  Uncle Jim, which was well received. In 1996 I met Neil McArthur, a fellow poet, who  encouraged me to try performing my poetry at the Bundy Mob's Bush Poets Muster. This  was the beginning of my career as a performing bush poet. 

    I have been fortunate over the years to be able to perform and win numerous awards  for my performance bush poetry at such places as the Mapleton Yarn Festival, Poets on the  Downs, Jondaryan Country Music Rush, The Winton Waltzing Matilda Bush Poetry  Championships, The Australian Stockman's Hall of Fame, The Bundy Mob’s Bush Poets  Muster, Central Queensland Bush Poetry Championships, The Surat Battered Bugle, The  Gympie Muster, Camooweal's Drovers Yesteryear Festival, Harvey Bay Whale Festival,  North Pines Camp Oven Festival, Glengallon Bush Poetry Festival, Imperial Hotel Bush  Poetry Competition, Tenterfield Oracles of the Bush, Bard of the Outback and the  Australian Bush Poetry Championships at Yarrawonga-Mulwala. 
  
    Since 1996 I have won a number of awards for my written bush poetry, which were  included in the seven books of bush verse and yarns I have published along with three  albums and I have been a finalist on three occasions at the Golden Gumleaf Bush Laureate  Awards at Tamworth. Here three of his books:
 

  ( Merve says that perhaps  a definition of Australian Bush Verse would be appreciated. Australian Bush Verse is defined as rhyming verse with good meter and rhyme, about Australia, its people, places, things and way of life. Thus, Australian Bush Poetry  is a little broader then cowboy poetry as Paterson and Lawson wrote on many aspects of Australian life. )

    Since 1999 Chris, and on occasions my dad, have joined me in our own show of bush  poetry and yarns, which we called 'Laughter & Tears from the Bush'.  Since 1998 Chris has accompanied me to The Tamworth Country Music Festival where we perform our show in front of Grace Bros. now Target.  From 2000 until 2003 Chris and I have been resident  bush poets at the Bailey Bar Caravan Park at  Charleville during the winter months where we performed our bush poetry and yarns show daily and we had the opportunity to meet so many folk and introduced quite a few of them to bush verse.  

   I am also the present Poet rep. for the Australian Bush Balladeers [ABBA] and the editor of a quarterly newsletter for its Bulletin magazine as well as the Bush Poet News Page on The Bush Balladeers web site.  I also write a column for the Country Roundup magazine. 
 

         Merve has been featured on http://www.cowboypoetry.com/mervwebster.htm; and this web site contains a collection of his poetry. Merve and Christine have their own web site. You can read more about Merve and other Autralian poets at:
                        http://www.bushpoets.go.to/

                                               

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